Do you know your value?

I recently shared two videos entitled the blessing of singleness part 1 and part 2, although the video itself was primary aimed at single Christian women I realised that it was actually aimed at more than just this group.  It was aimed at married Christian women and at women in general also.

As someone who has spent most of my life within the church, I am aware of the pressure that Christian women over a certain age experience when it comes to singlehood.  It's as if whilst you are in your 20s you are fine, and everything is okay but once you head towards 29 or 30, every sister in church or family member who are Christians become concerned and worried about your marital status, suddenly your singlehood and lack of marriage proposals becomes a problem.  It's as if you are no longer a valuable member of society, because no one has asked you to marry them and their is no ring on your finger.

As Christians you should be ashamed of the way you treat the single members of your church and community, especially the women and the pressure we place upon them to find an eligible partner and quick.  The constant questions that are levied at these people are unacceptable and rude and where have you found support in the scriptures to treat people in this way?  True the rudeness and insensitivity may not be a conscious effort at suggesting to the individual that they are not valuable as a individual or that they are not making a significant contribution to church life on their own.  Nevertheless, whether intentional or not the impact is still the same.

You should always endeveaour to value and esteem your fellow brethern whether single or married, you should show them the respect they desire and deserve and most importantly you should value them as a person.

Additionally as a single person, never sell yourself short.  Never settle for less than your desire or devalue yourself.  Recognise who you are in the Kingdom of God, many in the bible who did great works for God such as Paul or Jesus, were single themselves.

There is a blessing to singleness and it has a special role and contribution that should be encouraged and nurtured.  I know that there was much growth and development of my spirituality and personhood during my single years and the Lord taught me so many amazing lesson and provide for me in phenomenal and amazing ways.  He will do the same for you too.  I am so grateful for that inspirational and amazing time of my life.  He taught me so much about myself and who I really was in his eyes.  He taught to love myself, really love myself. not in a pompous or egoistically way.  He taught me to value who I was as a person, to enjoy and appreciate my personhold.   I knew myself and most importantly I learnt I was complete in Christ and that if and when I got married I would enter the relationship as a whole person, who would compliment someone else but not complete them.  I knew what I was bringing to the table and the value I had and that if I did marry one day, that man would be very blessed to have me as his wife.  Prayer for you today, is that you too will know the same.

Nevertheless, the constant question about my singlehood did irriate me, but eventually I began to ignore the insensitive questions, that one aunt in particular liked to ask.

My single sister whether Christian or not, I want you to always remember and know you value, you are worth more than rubies and diamonds.  You are awesome and amazing, created with passion and for a purpose.  You are phenomenal, you do not need a man to complete you and when you do have one he must appreciate your worth and recognise the rare gift he has been given in you.

Be blessed to be a blessing.